Letter To Dad (From Willem) About The Bed

Dear Dad,

I love my bed. Not inordinately so. People who know me know that I can often be found out of my bed way too early in the morning for a bike ride or a run. I don’t spend too much time there. But I must confess, I love my bed. There’s nothing like after a long day slipping into soft cool sheets and letting your head hit the pillow. It’s a wonderful feeling.

I didn’t think I took my bed for granted. Joni and I decided to get a king-sized bed about eight and a half years ago. The set was lovely and has stood the test of time. (It helped that we slept on a queen sized blow up camping bed for a week or two until we got the new mattress.) When we talked to friends who had gone through misery to try to get a good night’s sleep we appreciated our bed even more. But I realized last night that I do indeed take my bed for granted.

Last night Gerrit and I took your bed away. We replaced that comfort in your life with a hospital bed that we know you hate. If the LORD is so kind as to let you stay in your own home until that point ... you’re going to die in this new bed. Now I hate that piece-of-junk bed as much as you do! Well ... maybe I’d hate it more if I had to sleep in it.

Oh ... it was necessary of course. It wasn’t effective to take care of you in your old bed and it was taking it’s toll on mom’s back and your other caregivers to have to bend over in uncomfortable positions to move you for one reason or the other. It wasn’t safe.

I thought I should write you to mark the passage of this event. It is a big deal! When I consider how much I appreciate every good night’s sleep I’ve had for the past eight plus years WITH my wife IN my own bed WHEN I can get up WHENEVER I want and sometimes NOT WANT to go to the bathroom or see what’s wrong with one of the kids or a fire call or even get kicked in the head by Ella! (Our youngest is very wiggly when she gets between us in bed )

When I think about those things I realize all over again how much this wretched disease has taken away from you again and I hate sin and the fall and I long for Jesus to come back tonight and make it ALL RIGHT!

I realized all over again that this disease strips away everything. Everything! Every human comfort. Every human pleasure. Every human dignity. It’s all being stripped away. We get to see what’s underneath.

It reminds me of when Eustace is turned back into a boy from a dragon in C.S. Lewis’ “The Voyage of the Dawn Treader.” Aslan the Lion tells Eustace to take off his dragon skin and he does – he scratches it off – to find that he’s still a dragon underneath. After doing that a dozen or more times he realizes that he can’t “un-dragon” himself. Finally Aslan cuts deep into Eustace with his claws and the boy can finally clamber out of the foul dragon that he had become.

God’s cutting deep into your life too. Painfully deep. You know what’s underneath? I can see it now. It’s the Everlasting Arms.

As everything else is stripped away from you your Saviour holding you becomes more and more obvious.

I love that. You’re still teaching, Dad! It’s just a different classroom. You weren’t forced into retirement and you haven’t retired.

Thank you for letting the Saviour work out His Will in your life and for sharing it with us.

I love you so much,

W

1. What a fellowship, what a joy divine,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms;
   What a blessedness, what a peace is mine,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms.
   • Refrain:
     Leaning, leaning, safe and secure from all alarms;
     Leaning, leaning, leaning on the everlasting arms.
2. Oh, how sweet to walk in this pilgrim way,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms;
   Oh, how bright the path grows from day to day,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms.
3. What have I to dread, what have I to fear,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms?
   I have blessed peace with my Lord so near,
   Leaning on the everlasting arms.

Thanksgiving

The weather has definitely taken a turn to cooler nights, with sunny days between the rainy cloudy ones. Good sleeping weather. It is beautiful to see the harvest being gathered in, a rich token of God's mercy to us. There is so much to be thankful for. We are debtors to God for His lovingkindnesses. 'O for a thousand tongues to sing our great Redeemers praise.'

We enjoy freedom to worship and we have ready access to the Bible, good books, inspirational sacred music, Christian magazines, and technology that facilitates the use of all these beneficial resources (internet, SermonAudio, church telephone, etc.) God is still gathering in His Church, it is still the day of grace. We are accountable to God for how we make use (or neglect) these blessings.

How great it is to belong to a church and godly family where so much love, support and encouragement is given from the Word of God. I don't know how people can face a terminal illness like ALS without God and the support of his people.

One of our family traditions on Thanksgiving Day is after our church service to have the traditional dinner together with the entire family. At the beginning of the meal I ask everyone to come up with one thing, and only one thing, we are thankful for. Then during dessert we go around the table and each person shares their heart conviction - from oldest to youngest. You will be surprised what you hear.

The fall season is so full of wonderful colour: Orange pumpkins and gourds, red apples and maple leaves, yellow corn and squash, green beans and brussel sprouts, purple cabbage and pickled beets, white mashed potatoes and cauliflower, brown gravy and golden brown turkey, etc. A bountiful rainbow of colours, smells, and flavours. God is so good to us, and patient with us, despite our sins and shortcomings.

Above all, we thank Him for His only begotten Son, Who died and rose again as our Saviour. Blessed Thanksgiving to you and your family.

This week I traded in my power wheelchair for a manual one because my hands and arms have become too weak to operate the controls. This development further reduces my freedom and increases my dependence on Lena and others to push me around. I am still weight bearing when making transfers, but my knees are beginning to weaken and buckle at times. It is all part of the gradual but progressive loss of nerve control to my muscles. God is helping me to cope with these losses one day at a time, step by step. I am thankful that He gives me grace sufficient hour by hour, and day by day. (2 Cor. 12:9) He has promised to never leave me nor forsake me as the Good Shepherd. (Psalm 27:9)

Jack.

Fruit Bearing Christianity - J.C. Ryle

The Christianity which is from above will always be known by its fruits. It will produce in the person who has it repentance, faith, hope, love, humility, spirituality, kindness, self-denial, unselfishness, forgiving spirit, moderation, truthfulness, hospitality, and patience. The degree in which these various graces appear may vary in different believers. The germ and seeds of them will be found in all who are the children of God. By their fruits they will be known. Is this your faith? If not, you should doubt whether it is authentic. ~ J.C. Ryle

September Update

I haven't posted anything for a couple of weeks now, so I thought it was time to write a few things.  The Lord has provided so wonderfully for us through His people in the church and school community. Visits, phone calls, email, cards, meals, house cleaning, cutting the lawn, doing my physio, staying with me so that Lena could run errands, are examples of the help we have been given. Our children, and even our grandchildren, have been so supportive and helpful as well.

Our ALS journey has been particularly difficult for my elderly parents. My father is 91 years old and my mother is 85. They would love to trade places with me in a heartbeat. It is not easy for them to see me deteriorate.

I cannot go to church anymore, but I am thankful for the church telephone and Sermon Audio. I am still eating and drinking but difficulty breathing is becoming my biggest physical challenge. I have to say that my greatest emotional loss is the lack of ability to communicate with my wife, my family and visitors. I am slowly being imprisoned in my body, and left with my own thoughts and ideas.

The Lord has a lot of work to do in order to make me fit for His kingdom. God is teaching me to be patient as I wait for others to do things for me. I now realize how good I had it when I was healthy. I am slowly being stripped of all my physical abilities, privacy, pride, self - righteousness and left
to depend on God alone.

During one of his pastoral visits, Pastor Pronk encouraged me to follow the Good Shepherd wherever He leads, even through the dark valleys and difficult places, because the end is good. I often think about that statement, and I
am trying to live that out hour by hour, but it is not always easy to do. I take comfort in the words of the apostle Paul: But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus. (Phil 4:19)

Jack.